How can you and your husband manage money and stay on a budget when the two of you are so opposite with money. One likes to save and stay on the target; the other has no money value and just likes to spend.
I'd love to know the answer to this. We don't manage much together. I am a real work in progress with certain things and he just has a handle so we are individuals on this issue. We are working on some points together and making some progress there. I guess I would say start with something that is common between you such as mortgage, grocery and some bills. Maybe one pays and the other has to pay back a portion or percentage. Also deciding to save for a specific purpose gets both on the same path even if its just 1 thing. Clearly the saver is responsible to collect and be firm about getting the money. Maybe it's a vacation they save for together or a big purchase. Sometimes goals like that appeal to the spender. I know it does to me.
I like the idea of paying YOURSELF as part of a budget. It is $$$ that each of you requires on a weekly basis as pocket $$$ to spend as you and only you see fit. I found that if this one thing could be narrowed down and adhered to (it takes a bit of time to hone this because, invariably, each of us spends more than we think we do) , the rest of the finances quickly fall in line.
So you take your take-home figures and add them up. Then you subtract the pay YOURSELF monthly figures and you
use the balance to cover joint expenses. If there isn't enough to cover those joint expenses, it becomes immediately obvious that the figures paying yourself need to be cut back.
I found that if I could get a partner to agree to just a single line item on the budget...paying themselves....and it was within reason to me....and, most importantly, they could budget only those funds themselves...the rest kinda fell into place.
Budgeting is always more difficult when it is associated with restrictions. If I allowed for some "wiggle room" called "pocket money" then my partner didn't feel so controlled or so managed. It didn't take long until I was handed
his paycheck and then I immediately gave him his allowance pocket $$$ , the whole idea of a budget seemed more palatable to him.
I call it the Mary Poppins approach because "a spoon full of sugar makes the medicine go down."
Like your ideas. Put as much as you can on automatic pay or withdrawal so that the money is gone before it is squandered. Give each an allowance at each paycheck with the understanding that this is theirs and covers normal expenses such as lunches, goodies, etc. Try to get an agreement on automatic savings to a hands-off emergency savings account to cover unforeseen expenses. Maybe you can get agreement on another savings that covers vacations. The more money that "disappears" the less opportunity for excesses. GOOD LUCK!!!!! :-))))
Retrieving data ...