10 Replies Latest reply on Jul 31, 2014 2:50 PM by ladyjustice

    "final expenses" so-called life insurance


      If there were such a topic, I would put this into "Death style"

      My mother (age 90) has paid for her funeral.

      My spouse (age 70) and I have pre-paid ours - selecting cremation.

      Nevertheless, I see and hear advertisements for "final expenses."

      The truth is that I do not want to (and do not intend to) go out "in style."

      Anyway, what does "life insurance" have to do with it (read book "Things Money cannot Buy").

        • Re: "final expenses" so-called life insurance
          MyR Community Manager

          BoBraxton, thanks for starting a discussion thread on this thought-provoking topic!

          • Re: "final expenses" so-called life insurance

            My spouse and I have this continuous debate about how the final details of our passing will or at least should be handled. I must admit, I don't seem to be winning here. My argument that "you had better pass after me" doesn't seem to be the appropriate way of reaching consensus. But my stance is that the final details are more about helping those we love to face up to, accept and move on after we pass. So, for example, just cremate me and scatter me to the winds or at sea, may take away the need by some to be able to at least identify where they last placed you and where they might revisit and feel a presence. Then there is my lessor argument about what about the future genealogists that might hope to find where that eccentric lies.


            I don't mean to start a debate on how but I do hope that I can at least make people aware of or make them think about, understand and maybe discuss with their descendants what their feelings are.

              • Re: "final expenses" so-called life insurance

                the Northwest Earth Institute has a "study circle" book / curriculum on "Developing a sense of Place." I think what you advocate is important. In our case we have one offspring. He still attends the PC(USA) church my spouse pastored for 27 years. I believe our intention is that our cremains be placed in a small wooded area on the church property which has evolved into serving such a purpose. In the case of my spouse family of origin, two markers (along with cremains) are at the vacation spot which for 65 years has been the "only" anchor (sense of place) for that family whose children were born 1927 (living near Atlanta), 1929 (living Walnut Creek, CA); 1942 (living Montana, then Tucson, AZ) and 1943. In my case, my father (casket buried 1988) has a family stone marker at the Baptist Cemetery. We joined the Baptist church in 1958. My mother age 90 is still alive. Interestingly, the only time I have returned to that marker (my baby brother escorted me) I discovered a spelling error for my Father's name (Cornel U I s rather than Cornelius) and also my mother middle name (Ion a - should be Ione). Could try just using a little white-out (they do still have such?).

              • Re: "final expenses" so-called life insurance

                Well said. The expenses for life insurance has made me take a second look at how much I want to spend on a funeral. Most people today are requesting to be cremated. I can understand this now. For me, I have not decided yet on how I want to go out. I do know that I will not spend too much on this process. I would prefer that my family have some money to live on.


                After all, this is my final resting place and I will not have to tidy up before company comes over.

                • Re: "final expenses" so-called life insurance

                  As I have worked with my aging parents, I have enjoyed the strategy of determining just how much life insurance is needed.  My parents have been frugal and diligent to the point that we have taken the cash value and invested it along with the premiums.  Furthermore, I cannot believe how much these companies charge for the various types of whole life insurance, especially when they claim there are savings advantages to them; it almost seems unethical.  I have always been a huge advocate of term life insurance for younger couples or families while investing the difference for the future.  Life insurance is for protection not investing.  I realize that time plays a critical role and we never know when our end will come, but that should not stop us from thinking futuristically.  We do have people to take care of and there is nothing more satisfying than being able to pass on to our children or to some organization a nest egg.  It is my assertion to use term life insurance for funeral expenses.  Determine whether or not cremation or burial is the economical thing to do.  Besides, a funeral is for the living, should we care what happens after we are gone?  It really becomes a spiritual matter.